I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
honey bunches of taint.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
