Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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