i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
