When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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