This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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