I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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