Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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