Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
