I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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