So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
