I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
