Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
