ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
