I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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