I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
