You smell like stripper and shame
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
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