You're completely useless in the revolution.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
