He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize