so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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