At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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