Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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