I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
