mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
