We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
