What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Are we still banned from the library?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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