maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize