More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......