I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
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I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
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I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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