Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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