i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
