How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
