I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
