is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
