Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance

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(407): View more from Florida

i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.

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(214): View more from Texas

Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(203): View more from Connecticut

Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.

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(314): View more from Missouri

Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won

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(504): View more from Louisiana

I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.

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(905): View more from Ontario

Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.

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