idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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