My Higher Power is John Stamos
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
We need to rekindle our bromance
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
