why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them