Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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