thus making me awesome and them whores
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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