i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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