she was so not down for the gang bang
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
