I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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