no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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