C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
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