I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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