Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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