I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Randomize
