Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
