I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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