If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize